nikki_=]

Mon, 15 Dec 2003 20:35:12 GMT

Today was the worst day!

Sat, 13 Dec 2003 16:15:47 GMT

Last night I went to Kim's. We hung out at Mauricio's apartment with him and Troy. We walked to Sha-Mecca's then walked to the woods. Let's just say Kim got really mad at me. I know I shouldn't have done what I did, I didn’t know she was there. ...anyway Troy went to Jaycee's, Mauricio went home and Kim and I went to the Pizza place by the A&P saw Matt and Tyrell, they wound up chilling with us too. We went back to Mauricio's, sat on his steps. It was. . (Jay Jay, Matt, Tyrell, Mauricio, Troy, Kim and I) I told Tyrell that he was gay and he through off his jacket and put me over his shoulders, ran down the stairs and around the parken lot yelling, "What Did You Say?!" Hahaha!! Anyway, Matt called me that night telling me that he liked me. He goes, "I think it all started tonight when we hung out."

Tonight I'm going to a Christmas party. It should be awesome, I mean Bryan and Corey and all them are guna be there and they always make it fun. I'll probably hang at Kim's house again tonight or she here, I don't know.

I got my xmas tree this morning!! We're guna decorate it later on tonight. WhOoo!!!

And. . . tomorrow I'm guna go to Daniela’s =o) BFF!

Alright, I gotta go. . I'll update lAteRr! =)

Wed, 10 Dec 2003 22:21:12 GMT

People are so rude! Normally when I get a chain letter from a friend, I forward them to everyone that they sent it to, yano? After I did that I checked my mail and some kid named Luke Stone emails me saying. . .

Luke: hey i dont fuckin knwo you whered you get my address dont send me that gay shit
Luke: hey stupid fuck didnt isay not to send me that fuckin shit you dumb ass eat a fuckin dick your peice of shit fucker
Luke: Are you fuckin stupid, how about i fuckin stragle your fuckin through till you bleed out your mouth you fuckin stupid whore fuckin shit head.

Was that really necessary?! That just got me in a really bad mood!!

Tue, 09 Dec 2003 00:40:56 GMT

Heyyy!! Here's how my wonderful day went ..

[FiRST] Study~ Did nothing but talked to Carlos, Daniela, Michael and all of them.

[SECOND] Chemistry~ Got student of the month, and I found out that I'm really doing an excellent job and I'm moving up next year!!

[THiRD] Gym~ Got to be with Warren in volleyball. When I got to his team he clapped and leaned toward me and said "We're guna win" I go, "Actually Warren, since you're on the team, we're guna lose!" he laughed and said thanks. While we were playing he hit my ass with his hand.. :D I love you WARREN!!! HeHe!

[FOURTH] Math~ Finally stayed focused and did my work.

[FiFTH] Child Dev. I absolutely love this class!! Lindsay, Danielle, Hannah, Cassie & Andrea are so funny. Today Hannah, Linds and Andrea were talking about their younger years and when Lindsey was too scared to go to the bathroom - Andrea sticking her middle finger up at the teacher - Hannah. . well I cant say. LoL Damn I love you girls!

[SiXTH] Lunch~ Chilled with OC & Daniela

[SEVENTH] History~ BORiNG!

[EiGHTH] Art~ Had a great time with Mauricio and Troy =o) Mauricio was looking at this human body book and he laughed at the penis part and Mr. Montone was like "It's the human body, nothing to laugh about. . maybe if you grew one you'd know." LMAO! Troy and I cracked up.

[NiNTH] English~ Mostly talked to Brian.

I saw Rocco after school.. we both fell asleep. :D We have a 90 minute delay tomorrow. I'm guna look so cute!! I can't wait.

Anyway, I'm trying to make an Eminem layout for my journal. I have one made already, I just need to now put it up. I think you'll like it.

I gotta get in the shower and whatnot. *Love You*

Thu, 27 Nov 2003 19:21:51 GMT

Ahh! Diego juss called me!! The one that moved to Morristown. =) He goes to me "Hey sweetie, how are you and your beautiful blue eyes doing?" I go, "I'm fine but my eyes suddenly turned gray from not seeing you" LoL My brother said I was gay for saying that. Oh well! hah! We're guna chill next weekend, can't wait!

Rocco picked me up yesterday and we went to the apartments. He yelled at Jon for what he did to me and talked to his father. His father obviously doesn’t care because Jon told him it was a joke and he goes to Roc, "Well, if my son say it was a joke, it was a joke!" Whatever, it wont be a joke when he gets charged for sexual harassment. Anyway, I went over Rocco's house to meet the rest of his family and to have dinner with them. Afterwards we all went to Fortunoff.. then his two cousins, Kyle & Kenneth, Rocco and I went out somewhere. I got home 'round 11:30ish. Guess what? I think I have a lil ~~crush~~ on ~~Kyle~~ I'm sooo bad! LoL..but he soooo cute! You are all probably saying to yourself, "Who's next nicole?" haha, w/e.

It’s Thanksgiving!! WhOO I love this holiday! I’m not doing much, just having family over and stuff. Maybe later on tonight but not anytime soon.

I think I’m chilling with Daniela tomorrow [Friday] we’re guna get our nails done and stuff. Saturday I’m going with Kim to the apartments to see Troy and Mauricio then probably sleeping over too. And Sunday, probably seeing Roc.

That’s all I know for now, have a great weekend everyone! I love ya

Wed, 26 Nov 2003 20:30:46 GMT

I was sexually harassed today

Fri, 14 Nov 2003 11:38:52 GMT

I'm. . . . friendless

i dont know what i did wrong tho.. thats the sad part

if ur parents got divorce, would they still be brother and sister.. LOL

Thu, 13 Nov 2003 21:34:04 GMT

Juss sitten here on the phone with Bryan. He's 21!! LoL He's madd cool though. He doesn't sugar coat a single thing! He's so fucking nice and soo ~~cute~~ too. I've been talking to him for about 2 hours. (: When I get a picture, I'll post it in here.

I didn't go to school today because I felt sick this morning. I'm feeling better now that I slept all day. I don't feel like going to school tomorrow. Even though it's Friday. Bryan wants me to go to the game tomorrow but I don't think I can. Oh well, we'll always have other times to hang out.

I'm gonna see Rocco tonight~ wHoo wHoOo!!!!!

Wed, 12 Nov 2003 04:42:54 GMT

Hey! =) How was everyones day? Mine was alright.. just a normal school day, I thought about a lot ( it seems like all i do is think about things now a days ) lol but yeah i was just reminiscin ( sp? ) about an old friend, someone who i actually considered a true friend.. someone who i ALWAYS had fun with, and i guess our friendship just slipped away, and i just miss it i guess, we don't even talk anymore..it's so weird how a friendship can just disappear..

anyway tonight was fun, rocco and i just chilled here. him and i talked about a whole lot! i told him everything that was bothering me, like all my friends told me i should do, and he told me the truth (not that he lied) he just told me that he would never do anything to hurt me. i also found out that the night when i went to my aunts, he went to the pool hall with his friends Adam, Neil and his girl Nicole, which i knew about that. what rocco didn’t mention was that he drove Nicole to her car, now that makes me wonder. i'm probably starting to push this wayy out of proportion so i'll just stop. back to my night.. rocco was wearing a hoody and i was like "i know you're leaving that here for me, lol" he goes "of course baby!" soo right now i'm wearing his black 'HORTY' sweatshirt! i'm guna wear it tomorrow too. [\\i love you//]

joe is soo funny. . .

Rock yER Body xO (11:19:54 PM): you pic freak!
Bozy (11:20:07 PM): ass freak
Rock yER Body xO (11:20:22 PM): dick freak
Bozy (11:20:28 PM): cunt freak
Rock yER Body xO (11:20:38 PM): asshole freak
Bozy (11:20:39 PM): pussy freak
Rock yER Body xO (11:21:05 PM): fat ass mofo freak@
Bozy (11:21:07 PM): tit freak
Bozy (11:21:21 PM): pussy licker freak

k well.. i guess i'm guna go, mwah<3

Tue, 11 Nov 2003 21:48:33 GMT

My worst day just turned into being a fucking great day!

Rock yER Body xO (4:39:18 PM): i better be the top one on the list buddy!
Etniesrider (4:39:38 PM): lol u are now

Awhh!& I love that kid soo much.. if only
Call me pathetic but, I want him to sign my guestbook but for some reason, i'm nervous to ask.. what should i do? lol

I went to bed at 8:30 last night. It felt good until 7th period, that didn't do much good.

Tonight Rocco and I are hanging out. It should be fun, I guess, I'm a little nervous! :x Lexi know's why, I think. I dont know, I dont really like writting in here anymore. PEACE

Fri, 07 Nov 2003 05:06:19 GMT

I've had a head ache all day long. My muscles are so tense. I'm just stressing out way to much. I need to stop seriously. I'm making myself sick. I just don't know what to do anymore. I ended up goin to Boonton today to look at the house. It’s alright, the rooms are much smaller and everything is cramped up but it gets me outta this shity town so wtf! anyway we came back home and I felt so bad my head hurt so much that i wasnt even payin attention to anything. i cried so much in the car and some more when I got home, bcuz i honestly don’t wanna leave Randolph. On top of that, I felt so worthless to Lexi. She was really upset and I wasn’t there for her. Now I think I lost some true best friends. And now I think that Lexi hates me because she has someone better. But like everyone keeps telling me, it’s not a competition. I’m so depressed I can’t even fake a smile on my face like I usually can. I am soo tired i just wanna sleep but every time i attempt to close my eyes I just keep thinkin about stuff and it prevents me from any means of sleep. O well whatever someone told me today that if you act happy and act like everything’s ok and you feel fine then you eventually will be and you wont even hafta pretend. I don’t really see how that’s possible, maybe they just sike themselves out, trying to convince themselves everyday that life’s fine when its really not. Yeah...how can that be healthy? Well tomorrow I’m going to the movies. Hopefully that’ll lift my spirits up. It probly will because I’m always happy when I’m around Daniela and Joey. All we ever do is laugh about dumb stuff and find it hilarious. Man I love it. I luv them. (= Then Saturday I gotta go to Pennsylvania with Rocco.

I’m online and I’m really bored. I’m juss chatten with Jimmy & Jon P. They always make me feel better. Thanks guys (: There’s certain people that I wanna talk to other then them, but I’m always the one IMing them so I feel like they mite not wanna talk to me. I hate that I think there should b like a mutual agreement between people. Like, “hey one day you IM me then the next time I’ll IM you” just to keep a steady pattern going. Yah kno? I know I think of such stupid things. Well this entry was kinda pointless. I was sorta just rambling on and on about dumb stuff that I find important but no one else does. I’m gonna try n actually get some sleep tonite. Hopefully my thoughts will let me be, and I wont be up all nite wondering and worrying about stuff. Goodnite luvs.

I hope thoughts of me take over ur dreams to the point where u cant seem to fall asleep!

Maybe then you’ll know how I feel.

Bored

Thu, 06 Nov 2003 03:31:58 GMT

LAsT pERsON~

Slept in your bed - me & rocco
Saw you cry - rocco
Made you cry - My mom
Spent the night at your house - It's been a while
You shared a drink with - Daniela
You went to the movies with- It's been a while
You went to the mall with - Kim & Tim
Yelled at you - My mom
Sent you an email - Katie

that was pointless, i'm soo bored..

What Can I Do?! I Love You

Tue, 04 Nov 2003 20:08:57 GMT

you reminded me again of what i was capable of feeling
____________________

i hate this so fucking much! You know how I was on that diet? Well, lets just put it this way, screw it! I have been eating shit alll weekend/week. Yesterday i had a whole bowl of ice cream with all these toppings & shit. and today again, i had another one. wtf is wrong with me!!?? i can never stick to the god damn diet!@# i'm guna turn out to be a HEIFER! if not now, i will be later! i dont have to promise about that!
____________________

i hate myself.. not myself, myself (lol) i hate the fact that i come home straight from school and sit on my ass. i clean for my mom and do my homewerk but that's about it. i am definitely joining something before this year is over! im tired of this shit. always feeling like a loner, always feeling fat, always feeling like im not worth anything.
____________________

school was pretty fun. we had an awesome assembly 2nd period. i voted for *Phill* and i'm glad he won!!!!! WHOO WHOO eww and in lunch.. Keith was telling us that when his parents were drunk or something they told him how he was born. “well you started off with a blow job…then I put four fingers in your mother. . . .“ I would have cut my ears out if my parents ever told me how I was “made” YUCK!
____________________

well i gotta start some laundry & do some other crap. i'll write in here later~

Sun, 02 Nov 2003 06:38:09 GMT

Guys Like That You're Charming

You're the girl most guys can't get out of their heads

Even if they met you on a bad hair day :-)

You just seem to "click" with everyone you meet

So even if a guy forgets about you for a second... his friends haven't!

What Do Guys Like About You? Take This Quiz :-)

Find the Love of Your Life
(and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance.

Sat, 01 Nov 2003 06:12:57 GMT

woo! It's 12:30 and im just chilling online. Nothing to do, no one to talk to, blah..blah..blah :] Im really bored so im guna post again i probably said it all in my last post but ohh wellz!

--This week went by pretty fast, but yet so slow. Im just glad its the weekend. :] Im glad we only have until Wednesday til the 1st quarter ends. Im so close to failing history becuz of absences, so its cool. :] This way, i can stay home more often - if i dont have very many tardies/absenses. 2day, there was a fight in [1st] study skills. It was crazy man. I was just standing there watching what was going on. we always have fights in that class because this one kid take things so personally- its pretty cool though. :]

--Im so bored, ima tell yah all what happened in school :]

my mom drove cassie and i in =)
1st pr - Study skills~ fight! was sent to the guidance, main office & attendance, it was so crazy.
2nd pr - Got an A on my Chem lab and we just went over notes.
3rd pr. - Didn't go to gym..didn't skip either
4rd pr - Algebra, took a test and we had werk, to do - but i didnt finish it, of course.
5th pr - Shared our foods. Everyone did a GREAT job! I absolutely love my Child Development class!!!
6th pr - Lunch~ ran around trying to hit Matt. mostly chilled with carlos(2) daniela Orlando & troy
7th pr - Social Studies Did 2 werksheets. Sat around w/ Diego
8th pr - just sat in my jr. portfolio class, doing absolutely nothing besides talking and laughing with liz w. heather g. & Kathryn c, their sooo fucking hilarious
9th - took a pq then acted out more of romeo & juliet

I was supposed to stay after school with diego - i wasnt allowed to because my mom wanted me to go straight home. he walked me to my bus and gave me a hug and i gave me a kiss on the cheek =]~ So, i came home, hung out, cleaned, got ready for the party, left! i had a blast! ((trying to fit as many olives as possible in my mouth. i musta had 35! then spitting them out half on the floor half in the garbage! lmao!ERICA! Vikash: "Get lots of candy & remember, dont eat it all in one nite" hahaha hes sooo cutte.))

Moving on...

Friends -
Everythings going quite good. :] Josh and I - are started to talk again. I love him alot, and there's no way I can be apart from him again. Erica and I have became so much more closer its wonderful. cassie & lexi are just my two sexy bitches. (lex-i better still be the only one better in...haha) Theres no way im losing any of my friends, theres no way - i love them all too much to fuck anything up. Everything else, is just peachy. I get to see Erica Kim Mike & Brittany 2morrow. :D

Rocco Gurrierro -
Theres so much to say about him, but it cant just be 'somed up' in here. Hes so amazing, so wonderful, so p e r f e c t for me. :] He does everything for me, and hes everything i want/need, its just great. :] Last Wednesday - THREE months. woo! Time goes by realll fast, its been the best 3 months, so far. :] 7.29.03<3 He completes me. <3

School -
Im too the point, where i DONT care anymore. I dont care if i dont my werk, or not. I dont care - if i get C's and D's on my test/quizzes, i just DONT care. Its already the end of the quarter, so i can start off 'fresh' in about a week. Schools stupid. :]

Family -
Everyones getting along, for a change. Its quite weird, Although - my brother and mom have there 'disagreements'. My brother and i - have been getting along and talking alot more, than usual. I love my brother.. Nothing else to say. :]

<3
Good bye

Fri, 31 Oct 2003 21:01:16 GMT

I am juss sittin in my room, writing in here and yeh...

There's just a bunch of shit going on that I can't really say in here but I know that I’m just going to burst out in tears any second.

It was the last day for Diego A. I’m gonna fucking cry. He’s so sweet + understanding. He has became my bestest friend in less then a month. I’m happy that he isn’t moving far. I’ll definitely hang out with him. I love you Diego - Good Luck!

Happy Halloween everyone! =D I'm gonna try to be happy, be crazy, be me. I'm not gonna let this stuff I'm going through get me down, it's Halloween, I've got to stay happy and that's what I'm gonna do so therefore the rest of this day is gonna rock.

Today at school rocked. We shared our snacks in child development and I gave Warren an extra ‘Spooky Boo Cup’ Everyone did a great job on their food! I found out I'm getting an A in Chemistry!! I’m so happy, I love anything that’s Science related especially astronomy.

My mom is gonna take me to see Liz this weekend. I love her so much and I need to see her and see how she’s doing. It’s really sad what happened, I just really hope she gets better soon. I heard that she isn’t in as much pain as before, but we’ll see. I know it’s gonna be hard for her to come back to school and all. I don’t know, I love you Elizabeth Conklin<33

Well I'm gonna go. Bye

<33
*Nikki*

YOU THiNK YOU GOT IT...

Tue, 28 Oct 2003 21:44:46 GMT

WhOoO!* I'm SOO fucking happy!!!! I think Cassie has an idea, LoL. ::Drools:: The one I've had a crush on for like ever told me that when I see him again to spin him around and plant a big kiss!!!!

Warren: oh wait, next time u better grab me, swing me around and plant me a big fat kiss ok????? i left that part out before

I can't believe he said that! Wow anyways, I have a boyfriend. My bad!. . . . . BUT IT'S WARREN! LOL! How can I resist??

School was AWESOME! Cassie and I found out the point to life while watching Charlotte's Web. It means to fall in love, and have babies!!! LoL Other then the movie, life's about being Michael Jackson!!! LMAO!

Well, my boyfriend is coming over later and my room is a mess!!! Gotta go clean it~ PEACE! (I <3 You)

Tue, 28 Oct 2003 20:26:19 GMT

I'm really piggin out today! That's NOT gooood!!! maybe its just bc its that time :D shhhh hahh

Tue, 28 Oct 2003 02:00:30 GMT

In lunch the fire sprinklers went off by the bathrooms in the commons. Everything was nearly flooded and all the janitors and some kids were soaked! Haha, only 6th period lunch!!

My friend Diego told me that he’s moving to Morristown on Friday - so he wants to chill. I don’t know if I can or want to because one, doesn’t he have a girlfriend? And I know exactly want he wants to do. Two, I just want to be his FRiEND! Don’t get me wrong, I would love to hang out with him but I dont want to hook up with everyone who tells me that I’m beautiful and winks at me like he does. Guys make me sick sometimes, they cant just chill with the opposites sex without “doing something“!

Lexi is so fucking funny!!! I see her in the hallway and she yells out to everyone “Everyone! This is my ghettolicious underwear nikkerz” (probably not exactly what she said, but w/e lol) People were looking at her like “WTF IS THIS GIRL ON?!” that wouldn’t be Lex if no one said that. Haha. DAMN I LOVE YOU GIRRL! WOODEN SPOON!!!!

Well, we got our school pictures today. I didn’t though. I didn’t know when the ordering started or ended, and I thought they were gonna give us a sample picture to see if we wanted to order them or not and/or retake them. But, did our lovely school do that this year?! NO!! I guess it’s just me though - again - because everyone else didn’t seem to have a problem with it. OoH WeLLz*

I decided not to go to my aunts on Friday. I really wanna hang out with my friends and party and what not. I cant wait for Halloween!* I love CANDY as all you know, LoL!! I’m guna try to lay off on so much this year though. I need to get in shape. :-\

I just talked to Rocco, he’s out skateboarding. WooHoo! Fun! :-\ I see him tomorrow, I cant wait. I just saw him yesterday but it feels like a week. Ah! What does love do to us?! :D

Alright, I’m tried ~ nite

I HEART ADAM BRODY! (actor)

!Shake It!

Mon, 27 Oct 2003 02:32:43 GMT

Heyy!* Wow, since my last two posts, life’s been great after that little fight with Rocco and I, things have been better then ever. He came over today and gave me a really sweet note. He’s the sweetest guy ever and to even think about cheating on him or doing anything is totally out of my mind. ((Cassie, LoL!)) I Love Him So Much! <3

Well, my weekend kind of sucked. I didn’t go to school on Friday, supposed to go to the game that night but my fever was still high. Saturday was the homecoming dance, didn’t go to that. I think I just stayed home, had a few friends come over. Today I chilled with Kim and Rocco.

Warren and I are STiLL talking. I’m glad that after everything we can still be good friends. He got his license on Thursday, so that means we’ll be hanging out soon!! I cant wait!!! No, nothing is guna happen because I have a boyfriend and he loves Molly. I hope things work out between them, I don’t think their going out but I hope whatever he wishes for with her, comes true.

-just a little conversation. . .
RoCk yER BoDy xo (10:02:06 PM): heyy~
Etniesrider (10:02:11 PM): hey you
RoCk yER BoDy xo (10:02:28 PM): what's up?!
Etniesrider (10:03:15 PM): tons of hw for me but oh well how about you?
RoCk yER BoDy xo (10:04:18 PM): fuck hw! lol nothing much here, just chillin :-)
RoCk yER BoDy xo (10:04:57 PM): ahh have you heard the new Outkast song?
Etniesrider (10:05:35 PM): hey ya?
RoCk yER BoDy xo (10:06:03 PM): yup
Etniesrider (10:06:26 PM): yea i heard that a while ago its tight right?
RoCk yER BoDy xo (10:06:33 PM): trrueee!!
RoCk yER BoDy xo (10:07:14 PM): soo how was your birthday. . i know its a little late to ask, sorry
Etniesrider (10:07:53 PM): nah its alright, it was pretty good i guess, i got my liscense and some $$ which i used to buy a camera
RoCk yER BoDy xo (10:08:06 PM): web cam
RoCk yER BoDy xo (10:08:07 PM): lol
Etniesrider (10:08:36 PM): haha no its a regular film camera
RoCk yER BoDy xo (10:08:45 PM): daym . .
Etniesrider (10:08:50 PM): hahha
RoCk yER BoDy xo (10:08:53 PM): ;-)
Etniesrider (10:08:54 PM): sry
RoCk yER BoDy xo (10:09:24 PM): haha its cool. . . ill be getten a web cam soon, i think. i kinda gotta hid it from my parents tho
RoCk yER BoDy xo (10:09:34 PM): hide*
Etniesrider (10:09:38 PM): lol i see
Etniesrider (10:09:48 PM): then how'd u send me that one picture that one time?
RoCk yER BoDy xo (10:09:52 PM): ooh yeh you see.. youll be seein A LOT of me when i get one
RoCk yER BoDy xo (10:10:07 PM): ooh my friends cam
Etniesrider (10:10:23 PM): lol better question, do you have any more pictures?
Etniesrider (10:10:25 PM): lol
RoCk yER BoDy xo (10:10:47 PM): lol, nah. . (bad answer)
RoCk yER BoDy xo (10:10:55 PM): do you?
Etniesrider (10:11:02 PM): nope
RoCk yER BoDy xo (10:11:10 PM): fuck you then! dammit!!
RoCk yER BoDy xo (10:11:12 PM): hehe
Etniesrider (10:12:42 PM): haha
RoCk yER BoDy xo (10:13:10 PM): anyway. . how was ur weekend?
Etniesrider (10:13:41 PM): not too bad, i spent most of it tryin to relax and slept as much as i could, so i didnt do any work what so ever, and now i have to do it all
RoCk yER BoDy xo (10:15:43 PM): aw. its always good to relax. the damn teachers don’t know what it means to relax so they just pile all this shit on us and yeh.. haha . . . .anyway that’s what i mostly did all weekend too, that’s all i could do since i was sick :-\
Etniesrider (10:17:11 PM): yeah i know right i couldnt have said that better than you......im sorry i wish i could do something for you to help u get better.........and im really sorry but i have to go now and start this shit....have a good night, sleep well and i will cya tomorrow good night babe much love :) ;) :-P :-* :-D 8-)
RoCk yER BoDy xo (10:17:39 PM): aww lol you too hun! nite. . .

Friday’s Halloween!!! Is anyone being anything? I don’t know if I am or not, if I am I‘ll probably be a kitty cat. . Or not, LoL any suggestions? Anyway, I’m getting picked up early on Friday, like around 5th period to go to my cousins in Little Falls. My aunts throwing a huge party. I wanted Rocco to come with me but he has plans with Frankie + Fran to go to this concert. I'm a little nervous about him going because he’s guna be drinking. :-\ Anywayss, I know I’ll have a blast at my aunts though. I hope you all have fun, whatever your doing, and remember. . Be careful!! LoL

I love the new Outkast song, “Hey Ya” that must be the hottest song!! “My baby don’t mess around because she loves me so and this I know fo sho” Yup, I’m cool!

Lastly, I want to thank all my friends and LJ friends for helping me out and always giving me the right advice. Much love to ya’ll - xOx -

Okay, I’m leaven you know. . I have to get ready for school tomorrow. Write in here later!!! Love you!

*Rocco’s Note*

Nikki, I miss you so much. So much that I can close my eyes and see you hugging me + feel you hugging me and when I go to hold you you’re gone. I can smell you all around me hearing you say I love you. . . I feel like I haven’t seen you in a year, that’s how I’m writing. But, seriously. . . Its serious time! (that’s a joke between him and I) I want to kiss you I want to hold you and I cant. Whatever I did to deserve this torture, of not seeing you, I’m sorry for it. . . I want you here. . . I want to be there, to see your beautiful eyes again will be like that first sip of water on a hot summer day. To feel your body against mine, your heart beating against mine is the moment I’m waiting for. <3 forever. . Rocco

Awwwww I know!! LoL MWAH!

Sat, 25 Oct 2003 22:15:27 GMT

Well here I am, waiten for Rocco. I made myself a little make-over. I have makeup on like eyeliner + eye shadow when I NEVER wear either of that especially eyeliner. I did this for the reason of him not thinking of cheating on me or anything. I know its pathetic but it makes me feel better. Last night, we worked everything out but I still have a thought about him cheating. IDK.. He’s here, bye

PSS. Thanks for everyone’s help - I HEART YOU

"Remember To Breathe"

She fixes her lips they
Always look perfect
Never a smudged line
Never too much
I try on my blue shirt
She told me she liked it, once
She wonders what I'll wear
She knows just what she'll wear
She always wears blue
Some sneakers or flip flops
I'm starting to panic, wait wait
Remember she asked you
Remember to
Breathe
And everything will be okay

Fri, 24 Oct 2003 04:58:25 GMT

What a shitty day! I felt really sick 7th period so I went to the nurse and she let me go home. My dad picked me up at 12:30. Since that time until 6pm, I was asleep. It felt a whole lot better. I woke up, I ate dinner, finished some missing homework, took a shower, + my fever went back up. So I went back to bed. I cant sleep so here I am now. Too much shit on my mind.
I found out from a friend of mine tonight that she saw Rocco at the diner with some chick. That’s kinda alright since I have my guy friends that I hang out with. I say kinda because I heard from TC that he will flirt with ANYONE. He don’t care if she’s ugly. So now I’m a little scared that he might do something. But anyway, I’m pissed off at him because he left my house at 9 last night, and here it is 11am on Thursday and I haven’t heard from him. He told me that he was going to study with a couple of his guy friends one day this week. But it turned out to be one chick. I don’t know if I’m right by being mad, maybe you girls can help me out on this one.
Anyway, tomorrow (today) is Friday and I don’t think I’ll be going to school. I really want to because there’s pep-rally and I hate to miss that. *Good Luck* though. =) Tomorrow night is the homecoming game. I know my mom wont let me go. . So I guess I’ll just hang out here with Rocco and my party with my parents and their friends. (NOT!) Saturday is the homecoming dance and I’m defiantly not going. I’m too lazy to go out and buy a dress and everything, and I know this sounds mean, but I don’t really want to go with *him* lately things haven’t been the same between us. -- Erica invited me to go to 6 Flags with her on Sunday, but if I don’t feel any better by then, I’m not going.
I can tell you one thing that really “spiced” up my day - It’s Warren’s birthday (10/23) and so in gym I went up to him and he had a big smile on his face and he put out his arms and I hugged him and said “Happy Birthday” =) He got his license so now we’re not guna have anymore excuses why we cant hang out. LoL
Lastly, to whoever thinks that what I’m doing with Warren and Rocco is wrong. . I’m sorry but if Rocco can hang out with girls, call girls and ask them if they want to hang out, right in front of me, then I think it’s only fair if I do the same. I don’t know what Rocco does with the girls he hangs out with, but I hear shit about it. So I don’t know.
Well, its 1 now and I’m getten sleepy. I hope you all have a great weekend! And I promise to comment soon!! Later - -

Thu, 23 Oct 2003 01:35:21 GMT

Come notice me
And take my hand
So why are we strangers when our love is strong?
Why carry on without me

And everytime I try to fly
I fall without my wings, I feel so small
I guess I need you baby
And everytime I see you in my dreams
I see your face, its haunting me
I guess I need you baby

I make believe
That you are here
Its the only way, I see clear
What have I done
You seem to move on easy

And everytime I try to fly
I fall without my wings, I feel so small
I guess I need you baby
And everytime I see you in my dreams
I see your face, its haunting me
I guess I need you baby

I may have made it rain
Please forgive me, yeah
My weakness caused you pain
And this song's my sorry

At night I pray
That soon your face will fade away

And everytime I try to fly
I fall without my wings, I feel so small
I guess I need you baby
And everytime I see you in my dreams
I see your face, its haunting me
I guess i need you baby

After all,
oh,
After all

Well. That made me fucking cry. Wonderful.

(check out my info)

Wish You Were Here

Tue, 21 Oct 2003 22:05:33 GMT

I JUST NEEDED TO POST THIS AGAIN!!

BoRn SeXii: heyy
Etniesrider**: hey who is this?
BoRn SeXii: nicole e :-\
Etniesrider**: hey hey, whats the face for?
BoRn SeXii: lol b/c i didnt know if you wanted to talk
BoRn SeXii: to me..
Etniesrider**: yea why not? its all good......its been a while, what have ya been up to lately?
BoRn SeXii: (: nothing that much.. mmm.. I’ve been out every where since school ended.. this has been my best summer so far.. what about you? it HAS been a while
Etniesrider**: i've just been here, i went to New Mexico for 2 weeks, but i've just been workin in town all summer......i wish mine was a little more exciting, but im doin all i can to make it that way
BoRn SeXii: aww, thats good.. how was new Mexico?
Etniesrider**: it was cool, i went by myself and we backpacking (hiking) i had never bee out west like that beforte so it was a really good expierence for me, it helped me to grow up and mature a lot.........hahaha idk im just happier because of it
BoRn SeXii: hahaha, thats good.. yea i could have told you that you needed to be more mature but im glad you found that out yourself.. lol im only kidden<3
BoRn SeXii: i hope you didnt find that offensive.. or w/e
Etniesrider**: no no not at all
BoRn SeXii: lol kay
Etniesrider**: haha it was funny, im like that all the time so its cool no worries
BoRn SeXii: :-) alright
BoRn SeXii: sooo yeah.. do you still remember when you first talked to me well actually sang in 6th grade.. "ah ah goya" lol yea that was cute
Etniesrider**: yea i do.........and i cringe at the very thought of it......man that was so lame of me, idk what i was thinking
BoRn SeXii: hahahaha, dont worry about it hun, its all good.. at least we know each other now.. we were young and not thinking.. but thanks for doing it cuhz now i have a friend.. lol yea...
Etniesrider**: hahaha im glad i did it too, ur an awesome friend to have and i can only hope that it continues, and gets better for that matter
BoRn SeXii: mee too (:
BoRn SeXii: im also glad that you didnt change your sn or anything, then we really wouldn’t be talken..
BoRn SeXii: and you know i'd be too shy to ask you in school.. but i kinda grew outta my shyness so its all good
Etniesrider**: we out to hang out sometime
BoRn SeXii: we have to?
BoRn SeXii: ewwww
BoRn SeXii: hehe
Etniesrider**: if you dont want to its ok too
BoRn SeXii: aww duh, i dooo ~ i was guna tell ya that.. cuhz like last summer i said that and we never did! THANKS! jP
Etniesrider**: im sorry
BoRn SeXii: aww hehe its okay.. lets not make it another summer pass by without chillen kay?
Etniesrider**: yea i agree for real
BoRn SeXii: =)
Etniesrider**: are you still with carlos or no?
BoRn SeXii: nOooOoo.. im not with anyone =) thank god.. its fun to be free and explore.. lol are you with someone?
Etniesrider**: haha yea i know i totally agree, nah im not with anyone
Etniesrider**: that makes me feel better, or at least more relaxed when im around you
BoRn SeXii: yea, me too
BoRn SeXii: Carlos and I still close but not THAT close anymore..
Etniesrider**: yeah thats cool though
BoRn SeXii: yup
BoRn SeXii: so when we do hang out, what would you wanna do?
BoRn SeXii: i'd do anything so its cool
Etniesrider**: so will i its all good to me........i just wish it was like the end of october and we were talkin cause i would have my liscense by then
Etniesrider**: october 23rd
BoRn SeXii: yea.. well, i get my permit pretty soon if my mom ever calls for my 6 hours and if i get a car..
Etniesrider**: haha nice nice
Etniesrider**:
BoRn SeXii: yeah, but i dont know how "safe" you'll feel with me drvin.. i get soo scared.. like i stop then go stop then go..
BoRn SeXii: so maybe i'll let you drive.. i bet your better than i am
Etniesrider**: hahaha
Etniesrider**: i think im pretty good, mycuz already tought me the drive stick so thats cool
BoRn SeXii: thats good to know.. my car will be automatic lol i dont think i could ever learn how to use a stick
Etniesrider**: lol its not too tough im just hopin i'll get a car i think i will
BoRn SeXii: haha yea me too.. i have NO money saved for a car.. you prolly do.. or your parents are guna help you out..
Etniesrider**: well im workin my ass off right now, i have to pay for gas and shit, but im fortunate enough to have my parents help me out with a lot of it, i just have to stay out of touble and keep my grades up
BoRn SeXii: see, why cant i have a life like you? in my house you have to work for your shit and if you dont, then you dont get it.. but i get money handed to me here and there if i like go to the mall or w/e but if im not guna have my parents to support me then i shouldnt be buyen movie tickets, or cds when i know i dont have a job.....yet.. and i know it will take more then a couple of 20's to get the car i want
Etniesrider**: well at least you know what you have to do......i have to pay my way for anything i want just like you
BoRn SeXii: oOh
BoRn SeXii: so yeah, dont mean to change the subject but are u still a huge Incubus fan or did you grow outta that?
Etniesrider**: no way, im an even bigger fan then b4, thats not goin away at all
BoRn SeXii: haha
BoRn SeXii: i like blindside
BoRn SeXii: ever here them?
Etniesrider**: no i havent
BoRn SeXii: well, DL *pitiful by blindside* its my fav.. make sure you do it too.. lol i think you'll like the song
Etniesrider**: ok
BoRn SeXii: i wish we could be chillen tonite, you dont know how good i look i mean.. damn.. lol im not tryen to sound conceded... but i got ready cuhz this kid told me that he wanted to hang out but then he canceled at the last minute
Etniesrider**: i hate when that happens, you always look good lemme tell ya
BoRn SeXii: lol i know i know.. jk but thanks.. like i really dooo hate that. he called me at like 6 told me to get ready so i did he said hed call me at 7 to let me know that he was coming down.. but he called me at 7 :50 and told me his dad took his keys away.. duh.. i got soo pissed off
BoRn SeXii: so i was like asken everyone like nestor solari and carlos (ya know i only ask guys, lol) then nestor has work and carlos is tooo busy and everyone else just sucks! urg..
BoRn SeXii: ........anyways.. i talk a lot.. hope you dont mind
Etniesrider**: im sorry i was just out of the room
Etniesrider**: nah y0ou dont talk a lot at all, i dont think so at least
BoRn SeXii: lol okay.. soo if i start writen paragraphs you wont care? lol
Etniesrider**: it wont bother me or anything nah
BoRn SeXii: allright.. haha
BoRn SeXii: so are you going anywhere else like out of the state or out of Randolph
Etniesrider**: like during the summer?
BoRn SeXii: yea
Etniesrider**: in august im going to North Carolina to take my sister back to college but no where else other than that......how about you?
BoRn SeXii: nothing.. i havent gone anywhere :-\ but have fun
Etniesrider**: thanks
BoRn SeXii: np
Etniesrider**: so what are you wearing? you said you look good....give me something to fanticise over
Etniesrider**:
BoRn SeXii: lol
BoRn SeXii: lets see
BoRn SeXii: blue jeans that are faded in the front and back (lightly) this i wanna say like between light and dark blue tank top thingie... that ties in the front (the shirt is hard to explain) thenn i got my hair curly but it looks kinda wet and the curly are nice and perfect i have medium size hoop earrings in a nice tan from tanning at the pool and yea.. im jealous of myself.. lol
BoRn SeXii: curls*
Etniesrider**: hahahahahaha very very nice, you have me wanting to see you already
BoRn SeXii: lol already.. shit you should have been wantin to see me along time ago...DAMN
BoRn SeXii: haha
Etniesrider**: i did and still do
BoRn SeXii: good.. i wanna see you too
Etniesrider**: i look like shit, well i always do so its ok
BoRn SeXii: oh shut up! i didnt like you for like 9 years for your "uglyness" haha your hottt.. so idk where you come off saying that
Etniesrider**: hahaha well i am certainly not the best lookin guy out there........9 years for real?
BoRn SeXii: lol yea maybe even longer then 9 years.. 9 school years.. but yea..i bet your still hott as hell
Etniesrider**: thats cool to hear about the 9 years, idk what to say.......you're extremely easy on the eyes yourself i have to say......idk bout that last part....idk i just never thought i was hott or something like that
Etniesrider**: i wil let you be the judge of that
BoRn SeXii: haha alright
Etniesrider**: i feel like i just have to say this............but if we hung out, i think i would have the ergue to kiss you, idk
BoRn SeXii: omg!!@% yay
BoRn SeXii: for real?
Etniesrider**: yea
BoRn SeXii: i didnt know you were like that.. i mean maybe you know im easy and i'll do anything.. but omg.. i never knew you would say that to ME.. anyways.. i gotta say this.. when i see you i might wanna just rip your close off.. lol
Etniesrider**: i mean im not looking for a relationship, but i would still have this physical want for you .............i dont think your easy at all
Etniesrider**: i see it as you just do what you want to do
BoRn SeXii: true!
BoRn SeXii: im glad you dont think that of me..
BoRn SeXii: your not liek the rest of the jerks
Etniesrider**: true true.....wow this is really gettin me into, like this convo and all
BoRn SeXii: lol
BoRn SeXii: true true..
BoRn SeXii: :-)

Etniesrider**: i mean im not looking for a relationship, but i would still have this physical want for you .............i dont think your easy at all
Etniesrider**: i see it as you just do what you want to do

and that's how its said!!!! all you people miss judge me and finally someone knows the real deal!

Mind that ^Warren^ is the kid I’ve been liking for ever and him saying that to me, damn.. Well, I’m sure I’ll be adden to that convo soon, but for now, that’s all that’s up with me, LOL I’ll write more some other day probably Friday or something. *I love you* =)BTW-you guys can call me a whore and what not but just know that the guys want ME not YOU! *you know exactaly who you are*

You Should Never Wonder. . I Will Always Love You

Mon, 20 Oct 2003 02:11:28 GMT

Hey Kidds! I'm back - yay! It wasn't long, hopefully I won't be leaving again any time soon. (: Anyways I have some great news, I dropped 2 pant sizes in less then a week! YAY FOR ME!@* now for the bad news - I am moving out of Randolph! Saturday my family and I looked at houses/apartments all over. It was pretty depressing to me because I'm afraid that the special education people won't let me go to school in Randolph while I'm living somewhere else. :-\ My mom wrote a note explaining the whole deal, so hopefully they'll give in. Other then all that, I had a pretty decent weekend. I don't remember what I did on Friday. I think just chill with Rocco. Saturday, house hunting and watched a movie with Rocco + Kim. Sunday, today, went with Kim and Timmy to the mall, met up with some of Timmy's friends. I came home at like 3 waited for my aunt and cousins. Little Nicole and I we're putting on each others make-up, I looked like a damn clown! LoL They just left.

This week is guna rock! It's spirit week!!!
Mon~ PJ Day
Tues~ Jersey Day
Wed~ Formal Day
Thrus~ Clash Day
Fri~ Class Color (Freshman=Yellow Sophomores=Red Juniors=White Seniors=Blue) Also it's Pep rally/Homecoming game
Sat~ Homecoming dance - not going

I don't know if I'll be there for the pep rally though, my aunt's having a Halloween party and she might pick me up early. I hope I go to the rally so I can see the Juniors kick major ass!!#$% Well I think that’s about it. (: I'll write more when I can. BYEEE

warren (10:09:25 PM): whatever you want, i'll just bring in what i have and you can burn what you like

YAY INCUBUS!!!

PlAyA4LiFe = Jimmy
RoCk yER BoDy xO = Nikki
.
.
PlAyA4LiFe (10:38:24 PM): i def feel lke me and you have like grown farther apart over the last coupel weeks
RoCk yER BoDy xO (10:38:36 PM): :-[
RoCk yER BoDy xO (10:38:39 PM): me too
RoCk yER BoDy xO (10:41:08 PM): why tho?
RoCk yER BoDy xO (10:41:16 PM): we were soooo good
PlAyA4LiFe (10:42:03 PM): i have no idea
PlAyA4LiFe (10:42:04 PM): its weird
RoCk yER BoDy xO (10:42:11 PM): :'(
RoCk yER BoDy xO (10:42:14 PM): :-(
RoCk yER BoDy xO (10:44:08 PM): well. if we grow even more farther.. just know that i love you :-\
PlAyA4LiFe (10:45:16 PM): lol
PlAyA4LiFe(10:45:18 PM): i love u 2